Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
