i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
