he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
