i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
