bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
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