so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
