the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
