he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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