Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
