Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize
