Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
