Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
