One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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