did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
