I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
