She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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