there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
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