bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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