amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
my poor anus
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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