We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
