I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize
