Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I just want to make out with him forever
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
