in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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