you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
