you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Randomize
