he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
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