ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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