Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
