I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
