Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Still dying that you shit outside
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize