so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
