I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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