I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
