I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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