Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize