bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
