so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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