Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Randomize
