margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
