My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
