We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Randomize