i think i have herpe
just one?
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize