I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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