If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize