I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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