Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
COCAINE IS GR8
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Randomize
