Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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