I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
