We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
