PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize